The bible states, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else (shout out to One Tree Hill, aka my teenage bible). With Valentine’s Day coming up I was reminded not only about the guy who was now out of my life, but also that I never had a proper Valentine’s Day experience.
The only Valentine’s Day experience I had, with a boyfriend, took place on a Friday night in Uni, so naturally, he decided we should just party with all our friends. Do not fret though, the romantic that he was surprised me with McDonalds fries he picked up during his booze run. Beats flowers right? …
I saw a post on Elite Daily of a girl testing how guys would respond on Tinder when she asked them out for Valentine’s Day. I was quite intrigued by this (and a few cocktails in), so I decided to do the same on Bumble … but actually set up a week of dates this way. I started Saturday night, setting up dates for Monday through Thursday (with Valentine’s Day on Wednesday). Below are some examples:
I was pleasantly surprised that everyone actually responded nicely! So I began to schedule my dates.
Monday – Triathlon Man
On this date I got to tick off one of my London Bucketlist locations, Gordon’s Wine Bar. We sat outside by the heaters and it was a romantic setting, but the overall feeling was more on the friendly side. Throughout 2 glasses of wine and 2 hours of chat, we covered 3 topics: veganism, triathlons, tv shows, and back to triathlons. I’m not particularly interested by triathlons, but it was the only information I was getting from him and he wasn’t asking me anything new. We hugged goodnight and I texted him when I got home thanking him for the good time. He proceeded to question whether I really had a good time, saying he must have bored me with his triathlon chat. I repeatedly assured him I didn’t mind. Throughout the week he’d check in and continued to talk about his triathlon training. Honestly, I would have considered a second date, but needing to reassure him I’m not bored of him got a bit tiring. So to help my ghosting karma, I grew some temporary balls and ended things (via text).
Tuesday – Instagram Enquirer
This guys is actually one of the screenshots above (top right corner). He seemed quite keen, added me on WhatsApp, and then asked for my Instagram. I never share my account with Bumble guys or add any of my dates on Instagram. Sure I look at their profile if it’s easy to find, but I don’t add them. He confirmed he was asking to make sure I wasn’t a catfish. Right after sharing my username, he followed me (which is unnecessary with my open profile), so out of courtesy, I followed him back. When I asked if he had his proof I’m real, he didn’t respond.
Am I the only one that finds it weird to add Bumble/Tinder people on Instagram? Safe to say this date ended up being a relaxing night off rather than a date.
Wednesday – My Valentine
Though I was considering it Valentine’s Week, today was the main event. I kind of cheated, as this guy wasn’t someone I asked to be my valentine. I asked 10+ guys so decided to switch it up a bit. Oddly enough, he asked if I was free on Wednesday. When I arrived at Topolski to meet him, one of the first things he said is that his friends had just informed him it was Valentine’s Day and he was quite embarrassed. I thought it was funny, because little did he know …
We ended up having incredible chats; covering topics from light hearted to deep and personal over a bottle of red. We were quite tipsy by the end of the bottle and decided to bar hop. Venturing outside in the pouring rain, he immediately held my hand. We crossed Embankment Bridge hand-in-hand with a view of the city lit up at night – very romantic. On the walk, he told me how much fun he was having and asked if we could hangout again Saturday, which I agreed to. Our walk took us to Porterhouse for some beer (yes, I went back to the scene of the crime). There, we sat at a booth and it didn’t take long for the kissing to commence. I’m not one for PDA, but it was Valentines Day … everyone probably thought we were a couple anyways! Not ready for the date to end just yet, we headed towards Leicester Square Station and stopped in The Long Acre for one more drink. The date was such good fun, and I was excited about this guy. Finally, I’ve had my proper Valentine’s Day experience!
I should probably mention how it went on Saturday during our second date … let’s just say his true intentions came to light and we no longer speak. Typical!
Thursday – Running Out of Steam
Once Thursday came around, I really couldn’t be bothered to go on another date. I just wanted to go home, have dinner, and lay down. This guy was someone I’d been texting before my Valentine’s experiment, so I knew I shouldn’t bail. We went to Barrio for some happy hour cocktails. After such a good date the night before, I really was struggling to find a spark with this guy. He was really kind but after the third drink I suggested we call it a night, saying I wanted to avoid a hangover at work. He walked me home and we hugged goodnight. I think he knew how I was feeling because he didn’t bother messaging again.
Though I wish I had some juicier results from the experiment, I’m still glad I did it. This forced me to get back in the game and proved it doesn’t take much to make it happen. Don’t be afraid of being forward! Sitting around waiting for people to come to you is a waste of time in my mind – unless you are having a much needed Dick-Detox then do your thang girl!
Do you ever make the first move and ask out a guy? Let me know in the comments how it went! :)